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My friend Andrea Lee is making the late Thomas Leonard’s work available again. Thomas’s thinking stimulated my own creativity for several wonderful years. Here is a short piece about The Zen of Perfect that makes perfect sense to me when I am in the right frame of mind. When I am in the wrong frame of mind it reminds me that there is another way to look at the world. Enjoy! http://www.bestofthomas.com/blog/zenofperfect/
[These comments about What If You Stopped…? came in by email, so they can't show up in the Comments section]: Beautiful, Laurie! Love ya! Donna ________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Dear Laurie -
My new resolution is to write something before I read my e-mail. I made this resolution during the recent CAM (Conversation Among Masters) Conference, when Brian Johnson challenged us with two questions: 1. What is one thing to start doing, which would have the most positive influence on your life right now? I invite you to answer those questions for yourself. When I answered them and started thinking about the implications of my answers I learned a lot about myself. My answers were to stop reading my e-mail first thing in the morning and to start writing more frequently. So here goes… I am now more aware of how I measure my contribution to the world beyond the mutual contribution I make in all my direct, personal relationships. My contribution is the writing I do that helps others to change and grow without my direct presence. I measure contribution by the standard Eric Berne proposed 40 years ago: “is it good for the infant mortality rate?” To me that standard means is what I am doing ultimately contributing to a world in which more babies that are born alive stay alive. * Educating and coaching people about how to have important conversations is key for me. In order to do this I need to become more proficient with tools that will get my message out into the world. I’ll be contributing what I’m thinking about to two different blogs or perhaps three and my goal is to publish at least twice a week. This is a creative production goal rather than an outcome goal. Outcome goals don’t work well for me. They don’t leave enough room to be surprised and I often surprise myself. It’s a goal of staying in a creative tension so that I stay productive. This is how I will stay in integrity with myself. I need to stay in the creative tension instead of drifting off into “deserving retirement” or just grandmothering. I do enjoy my freedom to explore and travel and I adore my grandchildren. Both of those are fine in their place, but they are not enough for me. I need to stay creative and contributing in order to feel fully alive and happy. That’s a lot of insight from answering two questions. I admit I was in a very stimulating environment where I was surrounded by other master coaches all challenging each other to live their dreams. I hope you answer the questions for yourself, take time to think about the implications of your answers and share what you learn. You can post your answers and comments here. If you prefer, send them directly to me and I’ll put them up on the blog for you.
You can register HERE for some fabulous free tele-seminars with a mindset of joy, gratitude, authenticity and inspiration celebrating the holidays. Check them out. It includes Deepak Chopra, Marci Shimoff, Gay Hendricks, and many others. http://maestropath.com/holiday My daughter sent a note saying if I was going to talk about getting organized I should tell you about NAPO, The National Association of Professional Organizers. There is an organizer search function to find help with your organizing needs. Enjoy!
To help manifest Dr. Joe Rubino’s vision of raising the self-esteem level of 20 million people, here’s an irresistible offer for you that Dr. Joe Rubino is one of the world’s foremost experts on the topic of Self-Esteem and best-selling author of The Self-Esteem Book: The Ultimate Guide to Boost the Most Underrated Ingredient for Success and Happiness in Life. He He’s also offering you a free insightful audio called 7 Steps to Soaring Self-Esteem and a complimentary 1-year membership in The Success Achievers’ Club ($129 value) just for checking it out. See http://cli.gs/V8WdP2. Learn how you can help raise the consciousness of the planet by elevating your own self-esteem or the self-esteem level of those you love. Pick up your Audio and Club Membership for free at http://cli.gs/V8WdP2. Let me tell you a little about this life-enhancing Self-Esteem System. It’s being called the most comprehensive guide to simply and almost effortlessly raise anyone’s level of self-esteem. I’m confident that you will find this 3 part program to benefit everyone — from those with deficiencies in particular areas to those with more pervasive self-esteem challenges. The Self-Esteem System will support you to:
To claim your free bonuses, check out Dr. Joe’s life-changing work now at http://cli.gs/V8WdP2. You’ll automatically receive an email with all the information needed to claim all your complimentary gifts. Remember… to receive your $10,000 + in free bonuses, you must order any package at http://cli.gs/V8WdP2 before this special offer expires. Remember The Self-Esteem System also makes a perfect gift! |
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Aug 05
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Brief excerpt from a conversation with a client:
Me: So you didn’t live up to your ideals.
Client: That’s right.
Me: Do you think most people live up to their ideals?
Client: I guess they don’t.
Me: Most of us develop our ideals long before we encounter reality.
Client: Hmmmmm
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Mar 14
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Laurie will be interviewed on Barbara Dixon’s Spirit Speaks blog radio talk show. Her topic is "How to Nurture Your Relationship During These Changing Times." Tune in at 10:00 a.m. ET on Monday, March 16. by clicking the Play button in the box below:
You will be taken directly to the online player for the interview. If you would like to comment or ask questions during the interview, you can call in at (646) 727-3956. [tags]Relationship Advice, Relationships, Self Help, Difficult Communication, Money[/tags]
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Jan 16
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Three Different Things For You Today.
I have three things to share with you. First, I just finished an amazing book. If have a loved one or friend who has had a stroke or brain injury you need to read this one.
"My Stroke of Insight" by Jill Bolte Taylor, Ph.D., is a first person account of a brain scientist’s report of her own stroke and recovery of brain function over a 9-year period. It blew me away.
Second, I also want to share something that Jonathan wrote (Jon has reclaimed his birth name) as we were developing material to let people know that we are actively offering couples counseling again.
It was a spontaneous statement of why couples should come to us for counseling. It didn’t quite fit into the webpage we were designing, but I think it’s a wonderful restatement of our lives together.
"…we want to share what we’ve learned with you!
Why us?
There are hundreds of people offering relationship advice on the Internet, and thousands more offline. How are you going to know who to listen to, who to trust with the most important part of your life?
All these adviser have credentials; so do we. They have all probably talked to lots of different people; so have we.
So what’s different?
Very simple: we have been there AND we have applied our training, knowledge, theories, understandings, etc., to our own personal and business lives, and have lived to tell the tale.
We have been married (TO EACH OTHER) for over 48 years, and we have experienced, survived, and grown from almost everything that two people together will ever run into:
Sometimes we think that the only important experience we have missed is the rich learning of a divorce, but we have worked with plenty of people before, during, after, instead of, preventing it or encouraging it,
that we think we have some wisdom anyway."
We have also made our CD of our talk with marriage counselors about relationship development available as an online audio. You can listen to it right now I’m your computer, or download it to listen later. You can get it at this link: http://tinyurl.com/53wvyh
(Jonathan’s words again) "Listen to some REAL experts talk about what REALLY happens in relationships, and how you can use the information to make a difference in yours."
Third, I’ve agreed to help spread the word about a fr.ee tele-seminar being offered by my friend and colleague, Sharon Wilson. She is a leading transformational teacher who creates enormous success for the life coaches and entrepreneurs who work with her. She’s offering lots of bonuses when you register for the call.
So if you’re interested in how spirituality and business fit together, this will be a call you’ll enjoy. Watch for a post here with the title, "What’s been missing…" that you will show up on January 21. (It won’t sound like me, because I didn’t write it.)
Warmly,
Laurie
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Oct 13
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Remember the time you got one little piece of information that completely shifted how you felt about yourself or someone else. Remember the relief that came with the recognition that you were just like everybody else. It’s almost like affirming “Im really OK after all.”
I had one of those moments while flying back from spending time at my daughter’s home in Paris. I didn’t do a lick of professional reading or writing the whole three weeks I was away — until I got on the plane to come home.
I was reading a book about how the brain functions, and suddenly a bunch of information I’ve been accumulating fell into place. I understood that there is actually a reason that I don’t mix grandma and family responsibilities with my professional life. It’s not because I’m lazy. It’s because I really can’t.
All of these years I’ve been beating myself or — at least lately — gently remonstrating myself to get busy have been a waste of time. My brain — and yours — simply is not wired to manage two conflicting channels of information at the same time.
The book showed me that the brain focuses attention most like a toggle switch that changes trains to different tracks — you can go one way or the other but not both ways at the same time. This also explains why multitasking is vastly overrated. It is simply about how quickly we can switch back and forth.
Here I’ve been kicking myself because I get so fully immersed in the full-time grandma role that I can’t even think about the other professional role. I sort of know that it’s in there, but I just can’t get into it. The controls are locked. They’re locked for a good reason.
If they were unlocked I would do a rotten job each time I switched back and forth. It takes a while for me to get firmly back onto either track. That may differ for different people, but that’s the way it is for me. What about you? Can you switch tracks easily?
Just imagine me trying to write a letter like this while keeping my two preschool grandsons from destroying part of the house in their enthusiasm to learn more about it. I know some moms try to do creative work when their children are present, but most I’ve talked to just can’t do it.
So why am I telling you this? There are at least three reasons.
The first is that I love to share what I’ve discovered — sort of like the way my 2 1/2-year-old grandson screams with delight when he sees a picture of himself or of his family members. So if you can benefit from my insights and use them to make your own or someone else’s life better, please do so.
The second reason is that my whole career is about helping people, my beloved clients, have “aha” moments like this. It’s a really positive spiral. I love to do it. Their lives improve. I get a hit because sharing those moments is a rare and wonderful experience.
The third reason is that I need your help.
One of the things that happened while I spent 6 months focused on helping my daughter’s family move to France is that I let my practice diminish. Now I have only a few clients left.
After 35 years of practicing psychotherapy and coaching, I thought that would be all right with me, but it’s not.
My work has always been hard to distinguish from my play. I miss direct client work much more than I thought I would. I want to keep helping people directly as well as through my writing. I don’t really like moving toward retirement.
But the problem is, I’ve been sending out the opposite message. So right now I want you to know that I have changed my tune. I do want more referrals–NOW.
I HAVE SPACE TO WORK WITH FIVE MORE CLIENTS OR COUPLES who want to experience those fantastic moments of clarity and self-acceptance. I love helping couples reclaim deeply troubled relationships.
When I coach you, I’m interested in who you are at your core. I love to help you connect with yourself and others. Helping you live fully and joyfully with other people excites me. My work, through personal contact or through my writing, is about helping you enhance your own life and the lives of the people you’re close to.
Please help me spread the word. I connect with my clients in person, by phone and by Skype. I even have one client in Romania. I use VOIP and the web cam with my family, a new thing, since they are so far away. I haven’t used it for coaching yet, but I will. (Am I technical or what?)
So if you know of anyone or if you yourself would like to talk with me, now is a really good time to get started. Contact me by email or phone (303-794-5379) and we can discuss how we can work together.
Warmly, Laurie
P.S. I wrote most of this about 6 weeks ago — as I was trying to switch tracks from my voluntary family responsibilities back to my professional life. It took me a while to admit that I need help rebuilding my practice and to decide I trusted you enough to share that information with you and to ask for your help.
